I'm breaking up with you. . . Well kind of. It's not that I don't like you. Actually, I really do. Well, I did . . . In the beginning. ACTUALLY, if I'm being completely honest in the beginning it was just plain awkward. There, I said it. But it was. I mean, I only hooked up with you in the first place because some friends told me about you, how great you were, sooo much cooler than MySpace & they were from the States & so they HAD to be right, didn't they?
And I have to say, at first it was kinda weird & slightly uncomfortable because apparently not many people here in NZ knew about you, well none of my friends anyway. It took a while for people to get used to you, I guess. But a couple of months in & BAM, suddenly I had friend requests coming in thick & fast. I accepted close friends, I reconnected with old friends . . . & connected with friends I barely knew, & some I may or may not say 'hi' to when passing in the street, & some who I definitely did not know & most definitely would not say 'hi' to when passing in the street. It was great. All these friends. Aah, they were good times.
I loved to visit with you & find a new message on my wall from a friend or family member. I felt so loved. The opportunity to upload photos & let friends & family see what was happening in my life was just wonderful. I was a little unsure of the whole 'status update' thing at first. What could I say, to the whole wide world that was so important anyway? But it didn't take too long to get the hang of it & judging by the updates from friends, we were all catching on pretty quickly. It was great scrolling through friends' photos - seeing how they'd changed over the years, the adventures they'd been on, the partners they'd chosen, the children they'd produced. I don't know why, but it took me a while to get the hang of 'liking' updates or photos. But I must admit, it was wonderful to experience the convenience of simply clicking a button to show my appreciation or approval, rather than having to think up a meaningful comment to communicate the same. 'Selfies' were a revelation & I have to admit, one I grew weary with rather quickly. I'm not trying to criticise, it's just . . . Well, enough said on that topic.
Look, don't get me wrong, it was mostly wonderful. Really. I truly loved being connected to others in the way you allowed, during a time in my life when I was physically disconnected because of distance & the general business of life as a young mama. It's just that somewhere along the line it all changed. I'm sorry to say, things kinda soured for me. I didn't realise at the time but I can pretty much tell you the exact day it all went downhill for me - the day my third baby was born & I took my husband's old phone in my hot little hand for my very own & suddenly I had access to you ALL. THE. TIME. At a stage in my life where I was alone for more reasons than I care to explain, it was a comfort to know you were there just a click away & I could lose myself in you.
When I was with you, sometimes it was like no one else was around. It was just me & you (& the other 1 billion + users). & at the time i needed that comfort. Sure, sometimes I was meant to be using my time in other ways, & yeah, there were times when we were together that I could have been connecting with those around me & I chose you. It's just that you were so. darn. convenient. And easy. & you took me to another place. I could switch off when I was with you. I didn't have to think. & that was SO great.
And then it wasn't. I wish I was one of those people who could take or leave you. I'm sorry, I know that sounds harsh. But you know what I mean, right? The ones who hang with you for a bit or check in here & there. But me, with my OCD tendencies & you, & your alluring nature, well, it was all or nothing. Ok, it was all. This is the hard part Facebook, because I really do like you. You're great. No really, it's not you, it's me. And I'm sorry, but I just can't do this anymore. It's not goodbye, I promise. Just . . . from now on, let's leave it at a working relationship, shall we? Please don't think of me as using you . . . More, just utilizing your strengths. Ok?